Smk, smk: crushes & dick pics

You're Doing Great #7

MUCH TO MY CHAGRIN, last week I sent you an imperfect newsletter: it included two of the same drawing. Shoddy! Unforgivable! For my editorial negligence, I was sentenced to one additional week of looking for an apartment, which was terrible indeed. But after six days, they (I) let me off for good behavior, and yesterday I signed a lease.

Now that I am living as the Lord intended—squatting between precarious towers of cardboard boxes with the lights off—I assure you that this time I am on “the ball” (not a real ball; that’s already packed). This newsletter is so perfect, it’s wearing a turtleneck, chain, and fanny pack, which is a reference that will make sense to you in short order.

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Dear Sofia,
I have a secret crush on a guy I follow on Instagram. It's been going on for the past two months now and all I do is like his posts now and then (since I don't wanna be too obvious I'm sort of rationing my likes to a non-suspicious amount). How do I tell him? Do I tell him? Please help!!!
—Afraid of a 'No'

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Dear Sofia,
A couple of weeks ago a cartoonist I barely know sent me a dick pic in an email. I laughed out loud and snorted a little of my coffee. Was that the appropriate response?
Yours,
Juniper

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Links
Well, just one: please donate to Daunte Wright’s family here (page set up by his aunt).

As always, you can submit your anonymous questions here. And also as always, you can assume that if you aren’t validating me with likes, comments, and shares, I am forgetting I exist.

Smell you later, comrades.